My Musings

..... is Love ... Sweet Love .... It has been a really really long long day for it started yesterday night itself - with just another sleepless night (thanks to our sweet RLS - I still have not got time to get it checked and it has been over a month now) ... and then ... dont ask about the day. I will be really happy when the day I get back to office comes (never thought i would EVER EVER say that !!!! URGH!) ....  It has been a long week .. Started off with the R leaving for globe trotting to UK on Sunday morning .. Before I could rub my hands in glee and plan my so-called 'free' evenings - the little one goes and wakes up with a high temperature on Monday morning. I think that it must be that should-have-never-eaten-in-the-first-place 'ice gola' that she gobbled the previous evening while I was busy looking at trinkets in the mela in our apartment and leave for work ... I come back to find that she is still the same and has not risen out of the bed .. Worry start...

I was cleaning up my old blog articles and finding the ones that had got lost in my Drafts folder and never got posted and found this one - and felt it deserved to be posted. Because what a coincidence! I was doing something this weekend that resonated with what I just started to write here... I read an interesting article in The Young World (in fact go to touching the newspaper after a long time) yesterday - which set me thinking.  We live in times of excess - excess of everything - that we probably dont realize the sweetness of missing something or the value of anything at all!  I was cleaning up my kids cupboard and found about 7 boxes of crayons - each one of them opened and probably used just once or twice ; 15 pens of different shapes , sizes and types; 34 pencils ; 42 erasers of all different shapes, colors and fragrances ; 16 sharpeners (why would ever need more than 1 sharpener at a given point beats me!) - and all of these are not even bought by me !!! They all ...

The first time I heard this song from PK - I really did not give it much thought. But when I heard it on the big screen again - while watching the visuals, the song just stuck to be like glue.  Today, when this song plays I cannot do anything else, but just sit back, close my eyes and focus only on the lyrics and the pain of the truth in Sonu's voice. There are many a times in our own lives, when we have asked this same question - "Bhagwan hai kahan re tu?".. It could be one of those countless times when we are experiencing the loss of a close one, a defeat - professional or personal, or a time when we feel that once again we are having to struggle to get even the basic things correct and that we are tired of having to fight again ; or even those times when we helpless hear of atrocities like rape, murder, mob-destruction happening in the city/country... 

Maya had her 4th month shots yesterday and I noted something strange. The night she had her 2nd month shots we watched 'Dasavatharam' - thanks to the Mr. who held Maya all the time. And Yesterday night we watching a little part of "Kuselan" - thanks to Maya - who slept a bit early (maybe it was the shots). One starring the "universal hero" and the other starring his rival "superstar" - What a coincidence huh? The Mr. and I are not a great fan of movies - in the sense that we need to watch every movie that gets released - but are a fan of GOOD movies - old or new and make a point to watch the special and good ones.

Once in a while this post comes back ... because there is no specific topic to write about but a mix of many small small things. Why do the best of thoughts and ideas come at a time when I cannot pen (sorry key) them down. I almost wrote the entire blog in my mind while cycling back today and now cant recall a single word of it ! Arghhh! Yesterday was one of those days that came after a long long time in my life - when I just did not feel like doing a single single thing - could have sat a wrote this then - but just could not life my pen (oops sorry press a key down).  Life has been whizzing past with various milestones happening, some being jotted down hurriedly in the book of memories, some just lost in dusted pages of my own brain.  My dad has always hated me listening to bollywood songs , but I have always felt that my life has been connected with just those songs in one way or the other - or maybe I made the connection myself. Can't say - the mind is such a curious...

.... been searching for him for a long long time now. I had almost lost faith and thought that there would be no hope for me but just to go back to the "old" one only .... but luck-by-chance, I stumbled upon a garrish pink, odd font-ed cover in the not so often visited shelves of blossom book store last weekend - and took a chance and picked it up. It was a book called "The case of the man who died laughing" and read the synopsis and it sounded quite nice. The finicky me did not want to read a series from the middle and requested the helper lady to help me find the first book of the series of detective stories by Tarquin Hall depicting the Indian Poirot - Vish Puri - "The case of the missing servant". And today - I finished it! and BOY! am I glad I bought the book - for I find him .... the replacement for my Poirot dose that I have been searching for years together.  Tarquin's writing style is not exactly similar to Agatha's but there are similar...

Every time we have come back from a trip, I want to write about it and become so held up with other stuff that it gets relegated to the backend and slowly forgotten too. The other day, I was going through some draft posts and saw a half written post from 2005 about a trip to Mysore with in-laws. It brought back such delightful memories, so this time I decided that come what may I will finish this blog. This trip was totally different from the trips that we usually have - where the focus is on getting the most out of the place that we are visiting. But this time there was only one thing on mind - I wanted to put my feet up and leave it there for the next 2 days while I am being fed food cooked by somebody else, without having to worry about cleaning the dishes or cleaning the house ... and we did get that sort of a vacation!!! And some bonus features too :) After a round of debating on where to go, we dropped the pin on Chickmagaluru. Mr. jumped in to do his favourite activity of v...

... and the saga continues. My friends tell me that I associate every small thing into a story and make a big deal out of it. I guess that is what I am doing here, making a 3 hour trip to Malleswaram sound like a 15 day trip to Switzerland 😉... So, after saying bye to the fishies, the turtles and the 'beku' cat at the Nandi Thirtha temple, we plodded (read M&M plodded) to the next temple - the Laxmi Narasimha temple - which had a big queue lined up to see the god, who got covered with the 'sacred' screen - while the esteemed pujaris had their 'secret' conversations with the almighty. I always wondered why they close the screen and what they do behind - wish we could have a sneak peek sometime. So, at the time of the Hide 'n' Seek, they ran the bell loudly and there was a guy beating a big drum rhythmically. It was so mesmerizing the twin sounds - i felt transported to a place in my mind where I could dance unlimited to no audience except my own ...

I wouldnt say I am a very religious temple. Infact these days I am wondering if I am going on the path of being an atheist, considering the lack of any religious activities at home. Thankfully this weekend vetoed that out :)... not that I am believer that lighting the lamp daily or visiting the temple every week proves that I am religious. So, with the Mr. gone to meet mama dearest, I had the Sunday free - so decided to make best use of it - doing something which he probably would anyway not been party to - temple hopping in Malleswaram. Like I said, I dont consider myself too religious - in the traditional sense because I dont know many Slokas, or dont know what needs to be done on certain festival days - but I have a very good relationship with gods in my own way. I love temples in my own way - I love the chanting of mantras, the lamps being shown in Aarthi, the variety of decorations that are done to the gods and goddesses using flowers, the most amazing colored sarees and jewell...

Has it every happened that there is this movie that you just happen to adore beyond reasons and when you tell that to people, who otherwise like your tastes pretty much, look at you as if you have lost your mind ? That you watch the same movie twice in two days and even then you are ready to watch it a third time too, without batting an eyelid ...  This is how I am feeling about 'Jagga Jasoos'. I keep scouring the internet hoping for news that the movie is as hit as I am feeling it should be. Everytime I ask a friend to watch the movie, I am hoping he/she feels what I felt about the movie - that I loved every frame of the movie (except of that really unnecessary "khana-peena-chale-gaye" song). In a very very long time, I have felt this about a movie I feel. And I have been racking my brains, what is there in it that makes me feel so? So, I thought what better than to jot it all down here. Some things that I loved about the movie : In a movie world where a ...

... These days are no longer simple. Things seem to be getting too deep, personal and complicated. Relationships are getting thickened, the fear of moving apart is causing a gaping hole started to get created, trying to cram as much as possible in the little time available. Conversations dont seem to be wanting to be ended, the seats that are taken dont want to be vacated, excuses are being made to prolong every single discussion...  What a time to start reading the Sadhguru book that S lent to me.. and it starts off with the topic of Relationships.. Is it a mere coincidence! Though the book did not give me any solution to my dilemna, it set me off thinking..  How do I get into relationships knowing that there is always an end to them and then there is pain bound to happen? Yet I keep doing the same thing again and again. It just brings me back to this story that I read somewhere long ago. Guess it is the way I live life - that if I give, I give completely - else I dont ...

How Strange .... I was going through my last post on 2016 and the very things that had defined happiness is about to be thoroughly tested now.  A Big change has been declared in the Organization which has ruthlessly split us 'Fabulous Four' and thrown us apart onto different floors and different teams - thus threatening the very foundations of our relationship/friendship. How are we going to come out of this acid test ? ..... Very Successful - I am CONFIDENT! ...  But like each one of has said this oft and again .. "Things wont be the same anymore". So what? We will create NEW Things .. that will define us! - in a new and enhanced way!  Tea sessions might be fewer and in different venues - but the laughter will be just as loud and the affection stronger now that we cant just turn our head to find the other person..  But yes - things wont be the same......  Everyday as I come up the stairs and rummage through that blasted lunch bag (with just one big g...

Every year that time comes, when there is a lot of excitement around, smiles for no reason, same questions asked and brains racking to give new answers but failing to do so ... Yes it is the year end....  2016 just went by .... 2017 is brand new ... this is the only time when we can reflect on what actually went by... another week into 2017 and all of that will be totally lost, in the dust of memories that get collected in a hidden alcove in the deepest recess of the brain.  2016 was the year of making deep friendships! We create the bond of the 'Fabulous Four' at office. Tea slowly became the sole reason for coming to office ! As we sat and introspected when the transformation actually happened, we were not able to put our finger on it - but whenever it happened it happened for the best. It was filled with those long lunches we took, to bond and just laugh our hearts out. It also included two memorable movie watching - where what we watched more was our laughter and bon...

.... Okay I am getting to be a stereotype .. can pen down anything only if it is related to a song.. Probably because I spend so much time listening to only songs these days and not reading as much.. Either getting too jaded to read new stuff or not pushing myself to open the doors of my literary cell to new knocks! ..  This one is on the repeat for the past few days .. and it just does not stop even when the headphones are off. It keeps buzzing in the background .. just those 3 words .. Such important words - but words that we never stop and consider or are too busy to even think about... Life, of late, has been totally centered on our "Tea Sessions" - the variety of conversations, the confessions, the sharing, the caring, the occasional "guests" to the gang... To the extent that sometimes we are depressed that there are two villains - Saturday and Sunday - in between !! Amen to my "Tea Gang".. May this go on forever... Coming back to the Song -...

..... need not always been something that is evident and can been seen outside... There are many a times where there is a severe chaos in your mind or heart - everything in the outward world is perfect - life is at its peaceful best and attuned perfectly to a rhythm. Everything that signifies happiness is at its top form and yet there is this niggle in you that is stopping you from feeling and being at peace. Sometimes this niggle is a tsunami and the worst one is where you dont know what is the cause. I desperately want to find that rotten train of thought and purge it out, but am not able to do so. I think as I read somewhere it is best to wait and stay put till it ultimately flushes out its own. During these times, the best is to stick to your routine, be an automaton, listen to your favorites, read your favorites, listen to more conversations than talk - for you dont know what might slip out of your lips unthinkingly ... So, just hanging in there for this internal chaos to dissipa...

After 3 months of relentless scorching heat,  Bangalore is back to its envied weather condition.  The past week has been absolute bliss - min you only weather wise! Yesterday night it poured dinos and rhinos. It was such a lovely feeling going to bed listening to the heavy rain. It was so chilly that i brought our thick blankies out. Though right at this moment I am facing the aftermath of that bliss  - you guessed right - terrible roads and choking traffic. Last Sunday we went cycling,  after a break of almost 4 weeks.  The weather just awesome,  I could have cycled forever only if the roads are just as nice and there say not killing smoke from all vehicles around. It is lovely to be sitting in an auto,  going to work,  with gentle breeze all over me - so what if every 500m I am assailed by the stench of the ever increasing rotting garbage on bangalore roads!!!

Yesterday I attended my first ever live concert of a bollywood singer - Arijit Singh - and this was with live symphony. It was one of the most awesome experiences I have had. I guess Live Symphony means they make their own music. None of the songs they played / he sang were on the same pace or exact tune  of the original song. Even slow songs were played at a faster tempo.  The days leading to the concert I was skeptical if it is worth the money we were spending. Each ticket say 2250/-. And that too we were just the silver class - that means from where we sat arijit was barely visible.  On top of that when we realised that we needed to be around an hour early to collect tickets,  I saw quite miffed. But despite the 2 hour or so wait to get seated ( we got the best seats of our class) and around 20 minutes or so of listening 👂 to the chattoo radio jockeys,  once the prodigy singer took stage it was worth every paisa of the money 💵 spent.  Man the energy...

Of late, all posts are about songs right? I just guess it is a phase in life, when something becomes the shining spot in your life. I remember the Mr. telling me how some songs hold a sort of significance in one period of life. When we were in college and were apart for 5 years before we got married, the Mr. found Ghazals very very appealing - the soul wrenching feeling of poignance in them - made him miss me a lot and stay in that feeling of love for a long time. I don't remember hearing ghazals for the past 5 years at the least - guess he doesn't want that feeling anymore - not with me yelling every three seconds for something he has not done (ha ha !) I very distinctly remember the cassette that I had recorded for him - with some of my most favourite romantic songs - there was the son "Tu Jahan Jahan chalega" (Mera saaya) - and the Mr. would not hear it for it would bring tears to his eyes. Can't say it would do that now ! (Wink!) (Blogs should have emotico...

I am hooked on to this song since morning -  Yaari . Just cant stop the replay on this.  Love the way they have strummed the guitar so casually. Amitabh Bachchan rocks! His voice should be captured in something like an inhaler that you can open any minute and drop the music into your ears. Farhaan's 'rough textured' croon as the note hits high is amazing!!  Reminds me of my college days a lot - especially Inter days and the four years of B.Tech.  The trips to vizag beach on Scooty with my four dear friends; getting wet in the beach, laughing and caring two hoots about the world, those pizza treats, those meets in R's house and terrace and the dates to watch movies.  Life at hostel. How slowly we changed from caterpillars to beautiful butterflies over the years, freeing ourselves of inhibitions and drenching completely into pure, unadultered friendship. Those midnight birthday parties, midnight dances in the quadrangle on friendshipday nights, sitting on ...

In Sun TV, they used to (not sure if they still have) have this segment where they took a theme and showed movies on the theme every noon for a week, and would call it Vaaram ; eg. Comedy vaaram; Nagesh Vaaram. Similarly this week is like "Radio One Vaaram" for me.  Radio One is a channel that plays on 94.3 MHZ FM in Bangalore. Every morning and evening when I drive to and back from work, I listen to radio - not only this but two other channels - flipping as when I find something interesting. When I drive back, it is usually the contest time in Radio one and Red Fm channels. So, I tried to call the number or sms or whatsapp the number they give and have never been lucky.  Last Thursday, I dialed the number for Radio One (as always) and was shocked when I got the line on the third attempt! I had to find the jumbled title of the movie the radio jockey had given the words for. It was easy peasy. The call was recorded at their end and played a while later. I w...