As I waved bye ….
..to amma today, I was feeling so bad to leave her and Appa at home and go to work.
It is not something new, I agree. For nearly 5 years that I was in Chennai before marriage, every morning I left for work at 7:15. Amma would wake up early and cook for me. Appa would cut fruits for me and pack them. Amma would plait my hair and appa would drop me at the bus stop. And then Amma would be alone at home, waiting till I returned home – if I got lucky I came early at 7:30 in the evening, otherwise it was usually 8:30 or sometimes even 3 the next morning! Yet she would never crib. Whatever time I returned she would have something nice for me to eat / drink. All the house work was done and I would nothing but chat with her, see TV, eat and sleep.
Ever since they came to the US about a month and week ago, life has almost got back to the same routine. They get up and pack fruits for us for lunch. Appa sometimes irons our stuff for us. They make sure all things are ready there for us to leave and when we come back all goodies are on the table for us. They do all this without expecting a single thing in return from us. Even if I were to fight and say I will help – they won’t let us do.
The Mr. and I try to spend every single minute that we can get with them, so that they don’t feel lonely that much. When the Mr. was in a job that let him work at home, he took every of those opportunities to be with them. We spend weekends with them, taking them out showing them how our lives are in the US, share all small things about our life with them, involve them with our jobs and friends – so that they don’t feel left out. But still I feel we have not done enough.
Parents are probably the world’s most unselfish people. Right from when you are born till they die, they do things for you without expecting a single thing from you. Oh! As I write there is a lump in my throat – I do get emotional sometimes thinking of these things. Today is one of those days.
I should have maybe just taken the day off and been with them today. We left home early at 7 because I had a doc appointment. So, that meant that after waking up, I spoke probably 2 sentences to them. Appa remarked – “Neena ippo ponna saangalam thaan varuvela? Romba bore adikkume!” (If you leave now, you return only in the evening. We will be so bored) – In a very jovial way only. But that made my heart squeeze a bit – oh! Why could I not be with them for more time?
It all happens in cycles. My parents left their parents in Chennai and moved to Vizag for a life that was good for their kid and themselves. My in-laws stayed 1000s of Km away from hometown to provide the best life to their sons and themselves. And today we are doing the same!
But the only consolation is that – if it were any city in India I would have not been able to even spend 2 hours with them on any working day, but in the US I have the luxury to be home by 6 the latest – so I have the entire evening to be with them.
It is not something new, I agree. For nearly 5 years that I was in Chennai before marriage, every morning I left for work at 7:15. Amma would wake up early and cook for me. Appa would cut fruits for me and pack them. Amma would plait my hair and appa would drop me at the bus stop. And then Amma would be alone at home, waiting till I returned home – if I got lucky I came early at 7:30 in the evening, otherwise it was usually 8:30 or sometimes even 3 the next morning! Yet she would never crib. Whatever time I returned she would have something nice for me to eat / drink. All the house work was done and I would nothing but chat with her, see TV, eat and sleep.
Ever since they came to the US about a month and week ago, life has almost got back to the same routine. They get up and pack fruits for us for lunch. Appa sometimes irons our stuff for us. They make sure all things are ready there for us to leave and when we come back all goodies are on the table for us. They do all this without expecting a single thing in return from us. Even if I were to fight and say I will help – they won’t let us do.
The Mr. and I try to spend every single minute that we can get with them, so that they don’t feel lonely that much. When the Mr. was in a job that let him work at home, he took every of those opportunities to be with them. We spend weekends with them, taking them out showing them how our lives are in the US, share all small things about our life with them, involve them with our jobs and friends – so that they don’t feel left out. But still I feel we have not done enough.
Parents are probably the world’s most unselfish people. Right from when you are born till they die, they do things for you without expecting a single thing from you. Oh! As I write there is a lump in my throat – I do get emotional sometimes thinking of these things. Today is one of those days.
I should have maybe just taken the day off and been with them today. We left home early at 7 because I had a doc appointment. So, that meant that after waking up, I spoke probably 2 sentences to them. Appa remarked – “Neena ippo ponna saangalam thaan varuvela? Romba bore adikkume!” (If you leave now, you return only in the evening. We will be so bored) – In a very jovial way only. But that made my heart squeeze a bit – oh! Why could I not be with them for more time?
It all happens in cycles. My parents left their parents in Chennai and moved to Vizag for a life that was good for their kid and themselves. My in-laws stayed 1000s of Km away from hometown to provide the best life to their sons and themselves. And today we are doing the same!
But the only consolation is that – if it were any city in India I would have not been able to even spend 2 hours with them on any working day, but in the US I have the luxury to be home by 6 the latest – so I have the entire evening to be with them.
Comments
We had our parents visiting us for 10 days in Hyd last month and I couldn't make it home earlier than 10 PM any day :((
But, I have ONE thing that can help u stay with ur parents for a looong time...and that's a maternity leave...what say?? :))
$$ Usha - Yes Usha - you are right. Life is all about looking at the bright side of things, but what to do - there are those moments when this wise thinking leaves you and off it goes :(